No. 40 – Buy a Lottery Ticket and Probably Lose

4 Nov

Once upon a time, in a land 47 miles west of home, I gambled. I’m not talking about playing poker with friends for loose change, but real gambling. Tommy and I pooled our money together (all $10) and walked into the Blue Chip Casino. We were going to lose every penny and enjoy every minute.

Tommy and I maneuvered two chairs in front of a classic-looking slot machine. We would have none of that silly button pushing! This was a casino, dang it! We were going to pull some levers! I laughed inwardly as I noticed a row of my elders, each sitting between multiple machines playing them simultaneously. How strange my friend and I must have looked huddled around only one.

Did you know that drowsiness is a side effect of slot machines? That’s because they’re boring. We kept pulling that stupid lever, and we kept losing money, and we kept losing interest.

$2.37 was all we had left of the ten we started out with. In an act of desperation to be done, I placed my finger over the highest bet and glanced at Tommy for his permission. With one last pull of the lever, we waiting for the money to tick down to zero…but it didn’t. Oh no, dear reader, it did the opposite. In a glorious display of lights and noise, it climbed! It rose to $9, and Tommy squealed with delight. It went higher, and Tommy jumped up with excitement. It rose higher still, and Tommy let out his victory cry! An old lady scowled from her fortress of machines. I laughed and danced a jig.

Tommy and I took our winnings (thirty-seven dollars to be exact) and bought dinner.

I tell you this story because it’s far more interesting than the one where I bought a lottery ticket (and lost).

“The safest way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.” Kin Hubbard


One Response to “No. 40 – Buy a Lottery Ticket and Probably Lose”

  1. Tommy November 6, 2010 at 8:56 pm #

    Oh my word! One of the best memories with you! So good! This had me rolling reminiscing. Love it!

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